Lil Wayne's Videotaped Deposition Is Mostly Hilarious, A Little Bit Scary, Completely Bewildering
Lil rapper Lil Wayne is currently embroiled in a lawsuit against Quincy Jones III, documentary filmmaker and son of the more popular Quincy Jones.
Lil Wayne is suing Jones over what he claims is illegal use of his music in a documentary about himself. Lil Wayne claims that, while he did give the filmmakers permission to make a movie about his life, he never gave them permission to use his music in a movie about his life. Though Lil Wayne initially supported the project, he has distanced himself from the final product, calling it a "scandalous portrayal."
Technically these videos are footage obtained by TMZ of Lil Wayne's deposition at the hands of Jones' lawyer.
Specifically, they are videos of Lil Wayne claiming to be psychic, pleading a level of crippling forgetfulness that would make him a prime candidate for a 50 First Dates-inspired reality show, and, occasionally, threatening an attorney.
More broadly, they are videos of Lil Wayne being crazy.
In a moment that sets the tone for the scenes to follow, the first video opens on a voiceover of Katie Couric remarking, "Clearly, Lil Wayne answers to no one."
"Is that an interview that you actually gave with Katie Couric?" asks Jones' lawyer, Pete Ross.
"Is that an interview that I actually gave with Katie Couric?" repeats Lil Wayne. He furrows his brow in disgust and concern, "What's your name again?"
"Pete Ross," offers Lil Wayne's lawyer, off-camera.
"Pete Ross, that's a stupid-ass question," explains Lil Wayne.
And on.
A question about whether Lil Wayne performed at the Virgin Mobile Music Fest in 2008 prompts an unrelated anecdote about a shapely woman.
Lil Wayne: I don't know. But I know I did perform at this BAD-ASS BITCH's birthday party recently. She was crazy, stupid thick.
A discussion about photographers produces a Whitney Houston, royal-we-don't-smoke-crack-esque moment:
Lil Wayne: Have I ever hired a photographer to photograph an event? Sorry, sir, no, I'm a superstar, and people hire them themselves to photograph me. We don't hire them.
In another clip, Lil Wayne, straight-faced, explains that he has no recollection of pretty much anything that has ever happened to him in his life ever. He does not recall being arrested in 2007, or pleading guilty to a weapons charge in 2009, or serving time in jail after 2009, or specifically serving eight months at Rikers Island, or being arrested in 2008 near Yuma, Arizona, or, or, or...
Eventually, Lil Wayne, hoodie over his head, head on the table like his mom cannot come pick him up soon enough, stops waiting for Ross to even finish his questions, and just begins preemptively repeating "I don't know" every couple seconds.
When a voice off camera informs him that he must wait for Jones' attorney to complete the question before answering it, Lil Wayne apologizes to the room, explaining he is "psychic."
Finally, after explaining to Jones' lawyer that he "wouldn't describe" his image in the media—not that he wouldn't describe it as tough or dangerous or adorably forgetful, but that he just flat out would not ever describe it at all, using any words—Lil Wayne makes casual threats to him in a room full of lawyers.
"He can't save you," says Lil Wayne to Ross, jerking his head toward a suited man off-camera.
"And what does that mean?" Ross replies.
"I was talking to mysef," says Lil Wayne, staring at him, unblinkingly.
If it's half as good as the deposition videos, that documentary is riveting.