Public relations encompasses a multitude of skills: audience analysis, persuasive communication, business savvy. There are those who do all of these things poorly. These are the PR Dummies. The dumbest of the dumb, every week.

How do acquisitions for companies worth hundreds of millions of dollars get done? Generally not through unsolicited emails to the "tips" line of one of that company's media properties. Although you never know.

From: [PR Dummy]
To: tips@gawker.com
Subject: gawker.com Acquisition

We are a private venture capital broker. Our investors would like to open up discussions about the possible acquisition of gawker.com.

They are interested in acquiring profitable businesses in this niche that have revenues above $150k per year and/or have traffic over 100k unique visitors per month.

Offers are usually at multiples of trailing earnings, however, some deals are based on brand, user base, and traffic.

If interested in entertaining an offer, please provide us with some history of the online business and best time to reach you.

Best Regards,

[Sophisticate Businessperson]
Buying Team Lead
Site Sales Specialists

Thanks, we'll think about it.

[Thanks to everyone who submitted this week. Please send your own PR Dummies nominations here.]