The public relations industry is a heartless machine that cares not about a human's life or death, unless it can be used to sell a product. Your soul is only worth a poorly written press release. This is PR Dummies. The worst of the worst, every week.

Davy Jones, former member of The Monkees, died on February 29. He was instantly memorialized, in press release form.

From: [PR Dummy]
To: tips@gawker.com
Sent: Thursday, March 1, 2012 11:45 AM
Subject: AVAILABLE FOR INTERVIEWS: He doesn't "MONKEE" around ... 'KING OF POP CULTURE' from 'ANTIQUES ROADSHOW' Knows ALL @ NY PIER ANTIQUES SHOW

Hello:

In the wake of Davy Jones' sudden passing yesterday, one way to remember and cherish his memory is to look back at the abundance of MONKEES collectibles and recall just how huge this pop culture phenomenon really was.

And the guy who knows all about them is the "King of Pop Culture" – Gary Sohmers, very colorful and flamboyant longtime appraiser on "Antiques Roadshow," the show that started the collectibles craze on TV. (You'll instantly recognize him with his loud Hawaiian shirt and silver/gray ponytail).

"In fact," says Gary, "there was more Monkees memorabilia made than Beatles memorabilia. The questions is, are they worth more than the Beatles? "

He's central to the spirit of all the reality shows from Storage Wars to American Pickers to Pawn Stars and Hardcore Pawn, that are flooding TV based on the premise of discovering what people's stashes are worth.

Gary is going to be giving appraisals of pop culture items for charity (American Cancer Society) at the upcoming NY Pier Antiques Show - New York's largest antique, art, style and collecting event - on March 17 & 18 at Pier 94.

He is available for phone interviews and guest bookings!

Gary knows the values and stories behind 100,000 useless items from Mark Twain to the Simpsons & The Family Guy. He's funny, engaging, compelling and eminently quotable.

And he KNOWS HIS MONKEES. And has plenty of Monkees collectibles to showcase.
I would love to see if you can interview and/or spotlight him as a preview to the NY Pier show. He'll tell you (and your audience) the value of any pop culture collectible sight unseen!!

Thanks for your consideration.
I'd love to know your thoughts!

Best,

Randy Alexander
Randex Communications

This one came out the same day he died:

From: [PR Dummy]
Subject: Information regarding Davy Jones

To whom it may concern:

This email is in reference to the passing of Davy Jones, a local resident in Martin county. Mr. Jones recently became known as a spokesperson for our Company, GorillaTrades.com, a stock-picking newsletter based in Palm Beach County.

I have attached a recent commercial Mr. Jones was featured in, and give you full permission to use it. If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me at the number below.

Sincerely,
Michele Romano
GorillaTrades, Inc.

Davy Jones would have appreciated knowing that, in death, he helped such worthy causes.

Thank you to everyone who submitted press releases. Please send your own PR Dummies nominations here.