Today we learned that Julian Assange, everyone's favorite long-haired leaker, was denied appeal against extradition to Sweden. This is very bad news for Julian because it is in Sweden that he faces those sexual assault charges he's been trying to wriggle and writhe his way out of. One commenter eloquently captured his life in a single stanza.

From BZuckercorn:

Government secrets to the world Jules trumpets,
And he abuses those he views as strumpets.
Facing charges anew,
Said "I need a new 'do.
And, ooooh, please pass some more crumpets!

Poetry like this will have to suffice until Baby Shiloh grows up and daringly plays him in the gender bender movie role of a lifetime.

[Image via AP]