Ambitious, Talented Thieves Steal 35 Bikes at Once
Nobody bats an eye if a bike gets stolen, or even if two or three bikes get stolen off the same rack. But stealing three dozen fucking bikes at once? That's when you have to stand up and admit: "You, sir or sirs or madam or madams, are an ambitious and talented bicycle thief or thieves whose 'can-do' attitude will take you far in the world of thievery."
Somebody or bodies cleaned out an entire shipping container in a Queens park, making off with 35 Schwinns belonging to a nonprofit called Bike New York. Sure, you might be a gloomy Gus like the head of that group and say ""It is horrible. They have deprived hundreds of kids of having the chance to learn how to ride and ride safely." But who do you think will be riding those bikes now that they're stolen?
Kids in New York, surely. No net loss.
