If you mid-late twentysomethings weren't feeling the creep of years yet, this TV news will get you there. Also today: pilot news about a terrible musical show, Keira Knightley slums it, and Hemingway gets his wives.

  • Maybe you've seen this story on Facebook already, where it has spread like wildfire over the statuses of the site's generational sweetspot. This is a story for those born in the 1980s, basically. The network Teen Nick, which used to be The N but had a rebranding, has announced a new late-night block of programming, similar to Nick at Nite in that it's old TV shows that people can feel nostalgic about. Only thing? Those old TV shows are from the '90s. Yiiiikes! Shows like Clarissa Explains It All, Pete & Pete and Rugrats. It gets worse, my fellow 1983ers. This is mostly for people in their early-mid twenties. Yeah, the "The '90s Are All That" programming block will also include, well, All That and spin-offs like The Amanda Bynes Show and Keenan & Kel — shows we were just a little too old to be watching, I think. So that's depressing. Even the newer stuff is old. Ah well. Now if they brought back 'SNICK and started showing old Roundhouse episodes? Well, then I'd be crying tears of joy and age. [EW]
  • It's now pilot time, of course! It's always pilot time in February and March. So, here we go. Michael Chiklis has been cast in a comedy produced by Conan O'Brien, even though his No Ordinary Family hasn't officially been canceled yet. (For the record, No Ordinary Family is not a good television program, though I do appreciate the continued employment of Julie Benz.) So we'll see! Meanwhile, Michael Chicklets still works at the gum factory. While Michael ChickLits is dating Jodi Picoult. [THR] Bad luck guy Donal Logue has joined the cast of Hallelujah, that religiousy musical show from Marc Cherry. Yes, I'm aware that the phrase "religiousy musical show from Marc Cherry" is the incantation that must be said to open the Hellmouth, but I'm not standing over the Hellmouth dripping a slayer's blood onto it, am I? No, I'm not. So we're fine. I mean, Marc Cherry is doing a religiousy musical show, so we're not fine fine, but no Hellmouth at least. [THR] Mario Cantone has been cast on that Don Johnson show about the aging male hairdresser that is sure to be a hit. Now that Mario Cantone has been added to the show about the aging male hairdresser, I wonder if it will run for twenty seasons or thirty. [THR]
  • Keira Knightley, perhaps feeling that all the movie roles she wants these days end up going to Carey Mulligan, has decided to head to basic cable. The Syfy channel, no less. Aw, just kidding. She's fine. All she's doing is voicing the part of Tinkerbell for an multinationally produced miniseries that's something of a Peter Pan prequel. It's going to be all Syfy-d and "cool" and whatnot, I suspect, along the lines of Tin Man, perhaps. It's all good. Though, I am kind of curious about that Carey Mulligan thing? Does it bother her? [Deadline]
  • In case you were worried, or excited, or something, about the possibility of Rob Lowe replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men, don't be. Any of those things. A Parks & Recreation producer, executive producer to be exact, says that Lowe is under a long contract with the show and that he can't and won't be leaving any time soon. This was all just unfounded internet scuttlebutt. So let's start another rumor to see how far it skips, huh? It's Official: Judd Nelson will be replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. And Mary Stuart Masterson will be replacing Angus T. Jones. [EW]
  • HBO is adding cast members to their Hemingway & Gellhorn movie that stars Clive Owen and Nicole Kidman. Molly Parker and Parker Posey will be playing two of Hemingway's later wives, while David Strathairn will play John Dos Passos. Also Tony Shalhoub has been cast, which is scary because any time Tony Shalhoub is on TV it slightly raises the chances that they'll bring Monk back. Keep Monk dead! No more Monk! [Deadline]