[There was a video here]


Last night's Glee was all about rebirth, but, as the students and teachers of McKinley High discover, no comeback is without a price.

Having recovered from her bout of mono, Quinn finds herself torn between ex boyfriend Finn and Boyfriend Official Sam. Both have their benefits and drawbacks-Finn connects her to her pristine, pre-pregnancy life and Sam connects her with her life now that, while messier, is slightly more fulfilling. Rather than decide immediately, Quinn is weighing her options. When Sam suggests a boring date of ceramic painting at Color Me Mine, it seems as though Finn may have won out.

Sensing that he's losing Quinn, though too dumb to realize why, Sam decides to win back her affections by reshaping his hair (though I didn't notice the difference?) and creating a one man Justin Bieber tribute band called The Justin Bieber Experience. After testing out his new look and sound at a couple of Bat Mitzvahs, he serenades Quinn with the Bieber hit "Baby" in front of the rest of the Gleeks. Much to the chagrin of Finn (and anyone in the audience over seventeen), Quinn loves it and decides to choose Sam after all.

Things don't go as planned, however. Santana, still on a bitch-roll from last week, convinces Sam that Quinn did in fact cheat on him with Finn. Also won over by his "Baby" performance, she goes even farther by persuading him to break up with Quinn and date her instead.

[There was a video here]

Meanwhile, Sue has found herself in a "Sue-icidal" depression after losing the Cheerios' ticket to nationals and being publicly shamed by Diane Sawyer Katie Couric. After her attempt to overdose on children's chewable vitamins is thwarted by Schue and Emma, it's decided that she should join New Directions for one week to help lift her out of her funk. Of course, this is completely nonsensical, but Glee put making sense on the back burner ages ago, so we might as well go with it.

Once in glee club, Sue can't help but play the saboteur and immediately pits new friends Rachel and Mercedes against each other. The result is a "diva-off" in which the two wail RENT's "Take Me or Leave Me" at one another. While I'm sure that RENT-heads all over the Internet are caterwauling about how the original Idina Menzel-Fredi Walker version is so much better, I have to say that Lea Michele and Amber Riley did the song justice. Really, the fact that Mercedes finally got a solo justifies the slaughtering of a hundred RENT songs. Anyway, Sue's attempt to create unrest fails and the two girls are brought even closer together.

[There was a video here]

In a typical emotionally manipulative move, Schue convinces Sue to accompany him to the children's ward of a hospital to… what? Soften her heart? Show her the power of song? Again, there's no sense in attributing meaning to the meaningless. At one point, the hospital nurse tells the children that Sue has been interviewed by Katie Couric and they all get really excited to meet her (what more could an ill child want than to meet someone who has met an anchor from the CBS Evening News?). Schue then breaks out his ukulele (yikes) and they all, Sue included, sing "This Little Light of Mine."

The next day, Sue approaches Schue at school and says that her time at the hospital has made her want to sing with the glee club. Not only that, but she has the perfect song-"Sing" by My Chemical Romance. I had thought that Ryan Murphy had successfully beaten me into accepting any nonsense he throws my way, but I guess not because this number, right down to the club's weird Williamsburg-lumberjack costumes, had me completely befuddled.

New Directions, on the other hand, is incredibly pleased with it. So pleased, in fact, that they want to perform the number when they compete at Regionals. Sue, of course, has other plans. Having learned the vast secrets of New Directions, she decides to take the insider information she has collected to their competition Aural Intensity (what happened to Vocal Adrenaline?). Since losing her standing as a top cheerleading coach, she now intends on reclaiming her glory by coaching the opposing team to victory.