TV Guide released a list of television's top earners this week, and the truth about our favorite stars' incomes can be shocking. From Dramas to Sitcoms, Late Night to News, a list of the top earners for each category, inside!

While some of these rates make me sick to my stomach (Charlie Sheen makes $1.25 million per episode of Two and a Half Men!) it's nice to see that some respected and under-appreciated actors are actually getting paid well (Joel McHale makes $2 million per season of The Soup.)

And now, the top earners, by category...

Drama, per episode

Hugh Laurie, House $400,000+
Christopher Meloni & Mariska Hargitay, Law & Order: SVU $395,000 (each)
David Caruso, CSI: Miami $375,000
Marg Helgenberger, CSI $375,000
Mark Harmon, NCIS $375,000
Laurence Fishburne, CSI $350,000
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer $350,000
Denis Leary, Rescue Me $350,000
Gary Sinise, CSI: NY $275,000
Patrick Dempsey, Grey's Anatomy $250,000
David Boreanaz, Bones $200,000
Jeffrey Donovan, Burn Notice $200,000
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife $175,000
Dana Delany, Body of Proof $150,000
Lauren Graham, Parenthood $150,000
Jada Pinkett Smith, HawthoRNe $150,000
Jimmy Smits, Outlaw $150,000
LL Cool J, NCIS: Los Angeles $125,000
Chris O'Donnell, NCIS: Los Angeles $125,000
Mark Feuerstein Royal Pains $125,000
Jason Lee, Memphis Beat $125,000
Joe Mantegna, Criminal Minds $125,000
Tom Selleck, Blue Bloods $125,000
Michael Weatherly, NCIS $125,000
Matt Bomer, White Collar $100,000
Nathan Fillion, Castle $100,000
Thomas Gibson, Criminal Minds $100,000
Jon Hamm, Mad Men $100,000
Cole Hauser, Chase $100,000
Alex O'Loughlin, Hawaii Five-0 $100,000
Timothy Olyphant, Justified $100,000
Scott Caan, Hawaii Five-0 $80,000
Angie Harmon, Rizzoli & Isles $75,000
Anna Paquin, True Blood $75,000
Blair Underwood, The Event $75,000
Zachary Levi, Chuck $60,000
Ian Somerhalder, The Vampire Diaries $40,000
Shailene Woodley, The Secret Life of the American Teenager $40,000
Ashley Tisdale, Hellcats $30,000

Comedy, per episode

Charlie Sheen, Two and a Half Men $1.25 million
Jon Cryer, Two and a Half Men $550,000
Marcia Cross, Desperate Housewives $400,000
Teri Hatcher, Desperate Housewives $400,000
Felicity Huffman, Desperate Housewives $400,000
Eva Longoria Parker, Desperate Housewives $400,000
Dan Castellaneta, The Simpsons $400,000
Julie Kavner, The Simpsons $400,000
Tina Fey, 30 Rock $350,000
Jeremy Piven, Entourage $350,000
Steve Carell, The Office $297,000
Angus T. Jones, Two and a Half Men $250,000
David Duchovny, Californication $200,000
Kevin Dillon, Entourage $200,000
Adrian Grenier, Entourage $200,000
Miranda Cosgrove, iCarly $180,000
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie $175,000
William Shatner, $#*! My Dad Says $150,000
David Spade, Rules of Engagement $150,000
Ed O'Neill, Modern Family $100,000
Patrick Warburton, Rules of Engagement $85,000
Betty White, Hot in Cleveland $75,000
Kaley Cuoco, The Big Bang Theory $60,000
Johnny Galecki, The Big Bang Theory $60,000
Ty Burrell, Modern Family $50,000
Jane Lynch, Glee $50,000
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory $40,000
Matthew Morrison, Glee $30,000
Selena Gomez, Wizards of Waverly Place $30,000
Dylan and Cole Sprouse, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody $20,000 (each)
Rico Rodriguez, Modern Family $15,000

Late Night/Talk Syndication, per year

Oprah Winfrey $315 million
Judge Judy Sheindlin $45 million
David Letterman, The Late Show $28 million
Jay Leno, The Tonight Show $25 million
Conan O'Brien, The Conan O'Brien Show $10 million
Ellen DeGeneres, The Ellen DeGeneres Show $8 million
Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Kimmel Live $6 million
Chelsea Handler, Chelsea Lately $3.5 million
George Lopez, Lopez Tonight $3.5 million

Reality, per year

Ryan Seacrest, American Idol $15 million
Joel McHale, The Soup $2 million
Piers Morgan, America's Got Talent $2 million
Kate Gosselin, Kate Plus 8 $250,000 per episode
Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, Jersey Shore $30,000 per episode

News, per year

Matt Lauer, Today $16 million +
Katie Couric, CBS $15 million
Brian Williams, NBC $12.5 million
Diane Sawyer, ABC $12 million
Meredith Vieira, Today $11 million
Bill O'Reilly, Fox News $10 million
George Stephanopoulos, ABC $8 million
Keith Olbermann, MSNBC $7 million
Shepard Smith, Fox News $7 million
Wolf Blitzer, CNN $3 million
Christiane Amanpour, ABC $2 million
Lawrence O'Donnell, MSNBC $2 million
Eliot Spitzer, CNN $500,000

Stats compiled by TV Guide.