If we had $28 million dollars for every time we sexually harassed someone we would have $0. But HP CEO Mark Hurd snagged $28 million after trying to conceal a relationship with a contractor who said he sexually harassed her.

Hurd resigned yesterday over an investigation into his alleged sexual harassment. But it turns out that he was in negations for a new $100 million contract, and the company paid him $28 million of that to leave after an investigation found a "systematic pattern" of making up expense reports to cover up his affair with a contractor. (The contractor also accused Hurd of sexual harassment, though the investigation found those charges "unsubstantiated.")

So, new plan for financial success: Get accused of sexual harassment at the world's largest tech company.

[Picture of rich Mark Hurd by Getty images]