You can't trust reporters. Not with the facts, not with the news, not with the politics. Well BREAKING NEWS guys, THIS JUST IN: Apparently you can't trust them with your valuables either.

Whether it's a precious work of art, an old family heirloom or a shiny new Vespa, there's no guarantee that a news reporter will do anything with your prized possessions other than shatter them to pieces. They don't call it breaking news for nothing.You don't mind if I push on your ice sculpture a little bit, do you? It's normal to touch the art work, right?

Don't worry about my microphone wire. I know I don't.

Sorry I broke your painting, but don't worry, you can clean it up later.

The only thing I could find in this poor family's burnt out home was some coffee mug one of the kids must have made when he was little. So I did what mother nature couldn't and finished the job.

ATVs are great for outdoorsy types. Unfortunately, I'm not one of them.

You can lean on a sand castle, right?

If it was one of a kind before he dropped it on the ground, then doesn't it stand to reason that it's even more rare now? Way to increase the value there, big guy.

A phone so rugged it can stand up to anything except the corner of a fish tank.

I didn't get a chance to have breakfast this morning, so if you don't mind I think I'm just going to pancake one of these kids real quick.

See ya' Jose and Judy. I'm outta' here. I will, however, be back in about three seconds.

Republished with permission from Urlesque, a site that obsesses about the latest internet trends, viral videos, web humor and ephemera. Read the original post here.