TONIGHT: The main event is the conclusion of the Danielle vs. Everyone showdown on The Real Housewives of New Jersey. But we've also got the premiere of The Closer, plus new episodes of The Bachelorette, Last Comic Standing and more.

8:00 PM

The Bachelorette Ali makes the requisite ~hometown visits~ with her final four famewhores. (ABC)
Lie to Me Cal is asked to read the face of a paralyzed man in order to solve a shooting crime. (FOX)
Secret Life of the American Teenager More stupid, secret teenage stuff. (ABC Family)

9:00 PM

The Closer Season Six premieres! (TNT)
Last Comic Standing Viewer voting begins tonight as the final 10 show what they're made of and try to get us to laugh. (NBC)
The Good Guys Things having to do with guys being good, or something. (FOX)
Huge Something huge is bound to happen tonight, I'm sure. (ABC Family)

9:30 PM

Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory Season Three (I know, right?) premieres.

10:00 PM

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Fight! Fight! Fight! (Bravo)
True Beauty We're down to the final four, and the remaining contestants are faced with a moral dilemma involving a drinking/smoking pregnant woman. (ABC)
The Hard Times of RJ Berger RJ courts a girl, only to find out that she's part of the school's purity club. (MTV)

10:30 PM

Warren the Ape Warren, trying to boost his acting career, fakes being gay. (MTV)

Who's on the Late Night Couches Tonight?

The Daily Show: Landon Donovan and Bob Bradley (Comedy Central, Repeat)
The Colbert Report: Steve Carell (Comedy Central, Repeat)
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Tom Cruise, Sublime with Rome (ABC, repeat)
Lopez Tonight: Kathy Griffin, the Cast of Jersey Shore (TBS)
Chelsea Lately Joe's Crab Shack field piece, Bobby Lee, Jo Koy, Ben Gleib (E!, Repeat)
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Seth Meyers, Jonathan Hillstrand & Josh Harris, Tracy Bonham (NBC)
Late Night with Jimmy Fallon: Eddie Izzard, Angie Harmon, Big Boi (NBC)
Late Show with David Letterman: Nicolas Cage, Steel Train (CBS)
Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Julie Chen, Michael Ian Black, Dierks Bentley (CBS)