Today at Gawker.TV, let's all laugh at The Situation's high school "pizza face" yearbook photo, Tom Cruise threatens Regis Philbin's marriage, Kathy Griffin contends in a beauty pageant, and (spoiler alert!) watch the first four minutes of Futurama's triumphant return.

Kathy Griffin Gets Glamorous, Participates in a Child Beauty Pageant
On last night's episode of My Life on the D List, Kathy signed up to be a judge at a beauty pageant. Afterward, she's inspired to go for it, gets advice from the beauty queens, and hits the stage herself.

The First Four Minutes of Tomorrow's Brand New Futurama
MAJOR SPOILER ALERT! New episodes haven't been made in seven years (if you don't count the mostly-amazing made for DVD film series), but as of tomorrow everyone is back, from Philip Fry to Zapp Brannigan.

View Ladies Flabbergasted That Hot Chicks Like David Spade
The View time-traveled back to 1999 today. Melissa Etheridge was guest host, David Spade made an appearance, and Macy Gray performed. Watch an uncomfortable talk with Spade, and sexual tension between Etheridge and Gray after the link.

Jay Leno Reveals The Situation's High School Pizza Face
Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino stopped by the Tonight Show to warn the world about the upcoming rapture—also known as the second season of Jersey Shore. Jay counters by showing off a blemished yearbook photo of a Pre-Situation Sorrentino.

Regis Can't Help But Be Extremely Jealous When Tom Cruise is Around
On Live with Regis and Kelly, Joy Philbin stepped in for Kelly Ripa and Regis got a bit territorial when attractive men started appearing around his wife. Apparently, a naked Tom Cruise was especially distracting.