Nicole Kidman Will Sleep When She's Dead
That's the only time she'll have, seeing how she's in all the movies that are made. Also today: a new finance movie sounds financey, some bizarre casting involving Jacob Black and McDreamy, and a new toy/movie that will scare you.
It had long been James Gandolfini's dream to play Ernest Hemingway in a movie. Well now he'll just have to settle for producing Hemingway. His production company brought a Hemingway project to HBO, where it will now star Clive Owen as Papa and Nicole Kidman as Martha Gellhorn, the iron-willed authoress he was married to for a spell in the 1930s. Aha. A chilly Brit and a chillier Australian playing passionate Americans! [Deadline]
Frequently bespectacled TV star Simon Baker and Toby Froud's brother-in-law Paul Bettany are in talks to join the cast of Margin Call, a slick-willy thrilly about blustering financial types at the dawn of the current money black hole. Baker will play a broker and Bettany a trader and Kevin Spacey, Stanley Tucci, and Zachary Quinto will play other money types. It sounds like Boiler Room only everyone in the cast is total PUSSIES. Boiler Room rocks! I liked the part with the tits! And the part with the cars! The only thing better than Boiler Room is the obvious Boiler Room rip-off plotline on Dawson's Creek. Remember that? I mean do you remember how fucking amazingly stupid that was? Ohhh gosh it was so stupid. That whole season was so unbelievably stupid. Sigh. [THR]
Boy, Nicole Kidman is in everything! She's signing on to star with Nicolas Cage in Joel Schumacher's Trespass. No, sadly it's not a remake of the Ices T and Cube joint Trespass. It's a whole new thing about brutal kidnappers or something. Both Kidman and Cage have worked with Schumacher before. She was in Batman Forever, that curious if not unenjoyable muddle, and Cage was in 8MM, which is one of those most trudgingly dispiriting and bleak studio films I've ever seen. And not in a good way. It's just dreadful to watch all the way through. Schumacher hasn't made a good movie since... gosh, what? Time to Kill? Was that good? Oh, I guess Tigerland, but nobody saw that. Anyway. Good luck Nic & Nic! [Variety]
Yo, wanna hear some really strange casting news? Here are two bits. First, Taylor Lautner, the pig-nosed wolfboy who lives in the forest with his vampire boyfriend, is in this thrilla called Abduction, about a teen who discovers some bad teen things and has to go on the run, teenly. Which, fine, whatever. Justin Chatwin had The Invisible, Taylor can have his Abduction. But guess who's in the movie with him?? Maria Bello, Jason Isaacs, Sigourney Weaver, and Alfred Molina. Those are some heavy-hitting actorz! What's he gonna do, whine his sad nasal lines at them while Molina and Weaver are like "Is this why we don't have Oscars?"? I think that's exactly what's going to happen. So that's the first weird casting bit.
The second weird casting bit is that Patrick Dempsey, yes Loverboy himself, has been put into a Lasse Halstrom movie in which he'll play a vaudevillian performer at a crossroads in his career. Isn't that so weird? What has anyone ever seen in Patrick Dempsey that makes them want to cast him in movies? To me his best work was playing an animal-smuggling rocker dude who gets killed by monkey fever in Outbreak. Everything else? It's like watching grape juice sing a song. I can't elaborate on that analogy, but that's what it's like. There, I said it. I just don't get Patrick Dempsey. Apparently Lasse Halstrom does, though. [Deadline]
Two writers from Smallville, which is the Gunsmoke of former WB shows, have been tapped to write Monster High. What's this about? Here: "...based on a new Mattel property. The monster musical is set at 'frighteningly fashionable' Monster High and features the spawn of famous monsters including Dracula, Frankenstein and the Wolfman undergoing the trials and tribulations of high school." Click the link. There's a picture of the toys. Your daughters are doomed. [THR]