After the world collectively shrieked with horror at two-year-old smoking baby Ardi Rizal, the parents of this three-year-old Chinese tot thought to themselves, "Hey, we've got a smoking baby. Ours is a boozehound, too." Self-destructing babies: Your ticket to fame.

According to her mother—a professional collector and seller of rubbish—three-year-old Ya Wen fell into a five-day coma after a catastrophic car accident. When she awoke, she wanted nothing but cigarettes and booze. Little Ya Wen thieved packs from the local corner store, then graduated to stealing cash from her parents to buy her cancerous lollipops. She also likes to drink: "Three glasses of beer is no problem for her."

Unfortunately, her ciga-stage mom didn't make a video, so Ya Wen probably won't go viral but will float around the back corners of the internet forever, frozen in that picture, looking like she is about to cry. I can't tell if hers is the sorrow inherent to being a smoking baby, or that of a normal little girl whose parents forced her to inhale like a good girl for the camera crew. I can see the terrible future already: Jon and Kate Plus Nicorette. [DailyMail]