Earlier this week, we—the internet's leading beach monster authority—received three alarming photos of a shaggy monster that washed up "near Old Silver Beach in North Falmouth, MA." We sought out an actual scientific expert to analyze the find.

Sidney K. Pierce is a professor in the University of South Florida's Integrative Biology department, and an expert scientific investigator of sea monsters (really). We forwarded him the new photos. What do you think, professor?

"Only a guess, but from the teeth, I'd guess a small dog."

There you have it: it's probably a god damn dog. People, real monsters only this summer, please.