Lady Gaga is looking very lady-like on the January cover of Elle. She can't fool us! We know there is a penis hiding in there somewhere. Please help us search for it.

You can not fool us putting it behind your left leg. This is nothing more than a camera trick. We know what you're smuggling!

If this were America's Next Top Model, Tyra would say she's giving us "editorial." We know that she's really giving us Silence of the Lambs, because she has her candy tucked between her thighs. She's about to say, "Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me."

Now she needs a whole arm to keep the nubbin in place. Either that or it's hiding in the shadows. Damn, we thought she was way more hung than that.

Does that mean we don't get another glimpse at the hermaphrodite lady/man parts? Damn you, Gaga! You foiled us again!