We don't know about you, but we're pretty fed up with porn that insults our freaking intelligence! You just can't get epic storylines in jerk-films anymore. Where are the three-dimensional characters? The witty zingers? The New York Times investigates!

Seriously, the writing in adult films has gone to hell. Where have all the great porn screenwriters of yesteryear gone? What scourge against humanity, against everything that is righteous and good, could possibly compel humans to alter their porn consumption habits to the point that it becomes more viable economically for porn production companies to skip the dialogue and get straight to the boinking? Anyone have any guesses?

The actress known as Savanna Samson once relished preparing for a role. "I couldn't wait to get my next script," she said.

There's no reason to look at them anymore, she said, because her movies now call almost exclusively for action. Specifically, sex.

The pornographic movie industry has long had only a casual interest in plot and dialogue. But moviemakers are focusing even less on narrative arcs these days. Instead, they are filming more short scenes that can be easily uploaded to Web sites and sold in several-minute chunks.

"On the Internet, the average attention span is three to five minutes," said Steven Hirsch, co-chairman of Vivid Entertainment. "We have to cater to that."

Ahhhh, the internet, of course! Damn you stupid internet—You ruin everything!

Lights, Camera, Lots of Action. Forget the Script [New York Times]
pic of Sasha Gray and Belladonna via Fleshbot