Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak made it through his routine on Dancing With the Stars without doing anything deeply tragic! Except, you know, for going on Dancing With the Stars in the first place.

After Woz, as he's known in the Valley, pranced on stage with a pink feather boa and slung dance partner Karina Smirnoff around like an unruly piece of code, the judges grimaced. One said, "It was like watching a Teletubby going mad at a gay pride parade." But come on: Did the producers expect anything else when they put a portly billionaire on the show? At least Mark Cuban, Woz's rich-tech predecessor on the show, had a modicum of feline grace. All Woz has is a hundred-watt smile.

What was really funny: The jokes about Apple's Safari Web browser crashing, or a hostile judge not getting service at an Apple Store. Don't they know that Woz hasn't had a real role at the company for decades?