If you couldn't wait for Catherine Hardwicke's candid expose detailing her rise and fall from Twilight glory, well, we're sorry. Twilight: Director's Notebook probably isn't it.

Instead, when Little, Brown's young-adult division publishes the book in mid-March — conveniently coinciding with Twilight's DVD release — expect only the authorized good times: The casting process, the art direction, the chest-hair cultivation, the faint traces of vampire-summoning herbs outside Kristen Stewart's trailer, and the rest of the early-franchise mythology laid out in the style of Hardwicke's own journal from the set. We'll read it, though you industry moles should know that if/when we're quietly forwarded the missing segment recounting the day Summit changed the editing-room locks, we'll self-publish a special edition ourselves. Keep your eyes peeled.