Larry King's Scoop on Blacks and Lesbians
Trend alert: Did you know it's very "hot" to be black or lesbian right now? We know it's true because CNN coolhunter Larry King, 112, said so. Everyone laughed nervously.
King declared "black is in" on CNN Wednesday after talking to an eight-year-old Barack Obama fan named Cannon, who claims to be King's son from his 19th and current marriage, but is obviously really Wolf Blitzer's kid. Bob Woodward politely changed the subject.
Also, on LA radio, King wondered if we'll soon be ruled by a lesbian or something, on account of America's torpid lust for Obama, which proves we're freaky and queer and who knows who we might go for next, maybe a midget.
This would explain, in King's mind, why MSNBC's recently-installed lesbian Rachel Maddow is topping his ratings among the younger demographics. The fact that he says such things out loud would explain why she's doing so, in reality.