With its absentee voice talent including Philip Seymour Hoffman, Toni Collette and Eric Bana, Mary and Max was the least star-studded Sundance opener in years. Which was too bad for this guy.

We didn't catch his name, and we couldn't fulfill his plaintive request to send celebrities his way. But as the festival attains full speed today, let us all say a silent prayer for the Unknown Pap; may his striving not be in vain, and may he never be forced to merely settle for Ben Lyons.