Though Hugh Jackman's upcoming projects sound as though they exploded from the mind of a Ritalin-deprived, 8-year-old gay boy (Oscar hosting, 3-D Cleopatra musical), at least he's got Wolverine to balance the books.

Or does it? The X-Men series has always crackled with homoerotic subtext, and in its battle between Jackman's hero and Liev Schreiber's Sabretooth, Wolverine adds a titanic clash of warring, super-powerful bears not seen since the beer bust ended far too early at Faultline. Oh, and there's also Gambit, Ryan Reynolds, and what we think is a young version of Halle Berry's Storm. It looks as dark as we'd been promised, though we suppose there's always time for Fox head Tom Rothman to add a CGI Anna Paquin swinging through some vines.