Judith Regan, the crazy, Bernard Kerik-fucking former star publisher fired by News Corp. last year, is now locked in a public feud with self-regarding media argument starter Michael Wolff. They deserve each other.

The short version is preferable here. Wolff wrote a book about Rupert Murdoch, and Judith Regan doesn't like what he says about her in it. So she aired her grievances to Rush & Molloy this weekend:

"Michael Wolff has been obsessed with me and my sex life for close to 30 years," she tells us. "I'm finally going to give him what he wants - he's going to get [bleeped] by Judith Regan."...

"He projects his own perverted view of the world on everyone else. He is consumed with hatred, vitriol and pathological envy."

Regan also resents Wolff's past claim that "on several occasions, [Judith and I] almost got involved."

"He's having fantasies," says Regan. "He's a repulsive specimen."

May we just say ZING? Wolff has responded in his typical ponderous, driven, gossipy, and heavy-lidded fashion:

She told George Rush that I am particularly obsessed with her sex life. And while quite a sex life it’s been, I have been even more interested in her media life, and the ways in which it’s possible to make a fine living in the media as a train wreck. Indeed, I have written about her often—more gleefully, I’d say, than obsessively—for the same reason that she has gotten herself so often into the press.

The solution here is to let Michael kiss Judith as he's always dreamed, then let her punch him in the balls. Then they can both mercifully shut up.