Though the sight of Princess Leia in a gold bikini could make any gay geek question his sexuality, being married to Carrie Fisher apparently had the opposite effect on CAA superagent Bryan Lourd. The two were together for three years (he fathered Fisher's daughter Billie in 1992) before Lourd famously left Fisher for another man. Now, in her new memoir Wishful Drinking, Fisher claims that Lourd blamed her and her pill-popping ways for making him gay. Page Six has the excerpt:

"He told me later that I had turned him gay . . . by taking codeine again. And I said, 'You know, I never read that warning on the label.' I thought it said 'heavy machinery,' not homosexuality - turns out I could have been driving those tractors all along!' "

Sadly, our first reaction to the allegation — "That's so gay" — has been deemed verboten by Hillary Duff. Instead, then, we wonder whether Lourd's "gay pill" theory could explain all those Tylenol PM sponsorships at gay events: it's all a master plan by the pharmaceutical industry to keep us queer! Diabolical — and fabulous.