Oh, good: at the same time that parents nationwide find that their savings have evaporated, their children are becoming increasingly strident about harassing them to buy solar panels, hybrid cars, and organic produce. Not only that, but apparently our tax dollars are funding public schools that turn out an army of little Green giants ready to scream over watered lawns and plastic bags. You can almost see their parents smiling tightly through gritted teeth: "That's...good, very good." But as soon as a reporter calls, the adults are ready with an entire litany of annoying complaints:

“They’re on my case about getting a hybrid car. They want me to replace all the light bulbs in the house with energy-saving bulbs.”

Do they have jobs?

In Clinton Hill, Brooklyn, Jan Schmidt, a stay-at-home mother, and Mark Goetz, a professor of furniture design, have watched, amazed, as their 4-year-old son chastises them for letting the water run while they brush their teeth. “He’ll come over and turn it off and say, ‘Every day is Earth Day,’ ” Ms. Schmidt said. “He learned it at school.”

Ha, I bet she said that happily.

“They’ll say, ‘Mom, I thought we weren’t supposed to use plastic bags,’ ” she said. Douglas and Alison Distefano, of Rumson, N.J., who have two children, dubbed their fifth grader, Olivia, “the recycling militant general.”

That's nice, sweetie.

Paul Wyckoff, a writer in Hunterdon County, N.J., said his 15-year-old son, Will, yells at him for “leaving the car idling for a few seconds in the driveway.” He has even taken to turning off nightlights to save energy. “My philosophy is get the big stuff,” Mr. Wyckoff said. “I think he takes it too far. But I’m proud of him. I think he’ll moderate with age.”

Kids: shut up. You're turning your parents into Republicans. [NYT]