Field Guide: Tucker Max
Why the hell have we written so much about Tucker Max? Because you want to read it! What started out as nothing more than a one-off request to have a look at a bad movie script has blossomed into full-blown miniseries chronicling the many dimensions of our bro Tucker's internet-famous personality. But why did anyone care about this rather pedestrian guy in the first place? Schadenfreude is involved, we suspect. We've taken the time to delve into the psychology of this pressing issue below, in the Gawker Field Guide To Tucker Max. Complete with photos from Tucker's incredible life! Who is he?
Tucker Max is, essentially, a born asshole who managed to parlay that asshole-ness into fame. The wonders of the internet. He went to the University of Chicago and Duke Law School, and has spent his life since graduation relating stories about himself being drunk and hooking up with girls. Throw in some poop jokes and random destruction of property, and you have Tucker's entire oeuvre.
His stories got extremely popular online in the early '00s, thus his ensuing internet fame, book deal, and movie deal. A 20-year-old reading his stories would reasonably consider him a passable writer with a good sense of humor and some awesome adventures. A 30-year-old reading him would reasonably consider him a juvenile prick who did all the same stuff that everybody else did when they were young and crazy, but never got enough sense beaten into him by life to stop being an idiot. Tucker is 32. What's wrong with that?
"My mom told me when I grew up I could be anything I wanted. So I became an asshole," Tucker writes. His life goal is "To be a celebrity that gets paid to get drunk, act like an asshole, and get drunk some more." Okay, fine. But his self-esteem is predicated on the idea that being an asshole is cool, and anyone who objects is not gonzo enough to worry about. No. Hunter Thompson was gonzo. Tucker Max is just...an asshole. We're just pointing out exactly how much of an asshole he is, so we assume he's not upset about it.
He's kind of racist, he's probably scared to death of women who aren't self-loathing, he thinks he's a far better writer than he actually is, he talks tough to little guys while hiding behind a friend to make himself feel powerful, and just about everyone who's dealt with him in person-from employees to coworkers to shock jocks-thinks he's a prick. None of which would be that important if he hadn't positioned himself as some sort of heroic rebel. There's a time when being an asshole goes from being funny to being repulsive; that time was many, many years ago for Tucker Max. But he forgot to change. His stories aren't really that crazy, either. Ninety-eight percent of frat guys in America have all the same pastimes. Do some different shit, bro. Why does anybody care?
It's a mystery! We would have stopped writing about Tucker Max long ago were it not for the massive outpouring of public interest. Our theory is that everyone has met a Tucker Max or two in their lives; that loud ass guy at the bar hitting on the dumbest, drunkest girl and annoying everybody else in the place, and telling exaggerated stories about it for the next six years, bro. Nobody likes that guy. But please notify us if you detect his awesomeness.
