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Free from the vapid small talk she's forced to spout on MTV's The Hills, co-star Audrina Patridge finally has her own blog, a forum where she can finally unfetter her voice and speak from the depths of her very soul ("First I use the Dermalogica face cleanser, then the toner, and then Active Moist the moisturizer!"). In between pitching skin care products and admonishing paparazzi for spying on her (then using those pictures on her blog with a Splash photo credit), Patridge operates an advice column called "Ask Audrina," where the boring sample questions are quickly outshone by the icky, feeble requests from the comments section:

Hey Audrina...
Would you go on a date with me if i came to the West Coast?

I would show you a very nice time by taking you to get some cocktails (one or two somewhere very nice - your choice...)
Then I would love to take you to dine somewhere romantic...
Then maybe a movie? Or maybe a fire on the beach...hence some dessert! Maybe we can make smores, popcorn lol, or just whatever...
You are great
Ray ...

Undaunted by this offer of "popcorn lol" from Ray, commenter Cisco ups the ante by desperately begging for Patridge's gay table scraps:

Hey Audrina,
Since you live in L.A. and are on a show that films in primarily West Hollywood, where are your gays? I'm your biggest fan and always wondered how this show manages to keep the gay culture out of the scene. My gays and I love you and think your style is sickness. We just wondered if you ladies have a connection to the community here. Thoughts?

Here are some thoughts, Ray: Maybe you're giving gay people a bad name by throwing yourself at a vapid, C-list reality star and attempting to anoint her the next gay icon! Perhaps you should focus on the real issues, as with this Defamer-submitted question to Ms. Patridge: "Hey Audrina, couldn't your last name use another 'r'? It would really help keep us from misspelling it. LOL KTHNXBYE!"

[Photo Credit: AP]