A Very Brady Bitchfight
It’s always fun when a Shiny Happy People show like Full House, The Partridge Family or The Brady Bunch is unveiled as a breeding ground for future meth addicts, domestic abusers, and on-screen mother/son duos still bitchily feuding decades after their stars have burnt out. And the Brady cast is by far the most over-achieving bunch of fuck-ups to efficiently destroy any warm and fuzzy associations we may have had with that humorless bundle of 70s saccharine. Following Jan and Marsha’s fictional sibling rivalry leading to a non-fictional lesbian porn, little Cindy Brady showed up to a radio interview last week reeking of vintage wine and memories, excusing herself to vomit during commercial breaks. And now, reality trainwreck Christopher “Peter” Knight has taken down the last remaining beacon of Brady light, Florence Henderson, by involving the (until now) scandal-free actress in a messy online war of words:
In a twisted way, sweet old Carol Brady was reportedly the first to open fire in what MSNBC describes as a nasty ongoing fight with VH1 reality standby Knight, all taking place on the very un-Brady battlegrounds of MySpace and personal blogs. In an otherwise innocent attempt to promote her latest TV flick on one of those Television For Ladies networks, Henderson was prompted to discuss her appearance on Knight's first post-Peter breakthrough role in The Surreal Life, where he met current wife and co-star of his second romp through reality show wasteland, America's Next Top Model winner and celebrity stoner Adrianne Curry. And Flo painted a not-so-pretty picture of the lovebirds, claiming VH1 producers were the masterminds behind the pair getting hitched, calling upon her to egg on the union, a coupling Henderson did not approve of whatsoever. In the rare instance when much-needed publicity looks plausible, Curry had her goons fight back on a minor entertainment website, following up with a conflicting apology on her blog. Eager for a little press of his own, Knight released a very sexist statement about silly women and their tendency to bicker when "generational differences" are involved, successfully making all things Very Brady very, very loathsome.