Spitzer to Devote Self to Making Money
There's some good news for Eliot Spitzer today! The former governor, who prematurely became former when he was caught sleeping with prostitutes, has been laying low since his resignation, leaving people to speculate just what he'll do next. And today we get an answer! He's going to screw over homeowners. Spitzer, who built his reputation on defending the little guy against Wall Street's worst, is starting a vulture fund. He's taking over his dad's real estate company in order to "scoop up distressed real estate assets around the country, revamp them, and flip the properties for a profit," he told a group of DC union officials last month. Now that he's free of the obligation to govern people to the best of his ability, he's free to take advantage of the massive credit crisis that's shaking the very foundation of our economy for a quick buck. The Sun explains more:
Mr. Spitzer is moving aggressively to occupy a niche created by the credit crunch, the subprime mortgage crisis, a surge in foreclosures, and a declining real estate market. He is looking to mine for riches in projects that banks are no longer willing to finance.
Distressed real estate funds - also known as "vulture" or, more euphemistically, "opportunity" funds - typically promise returns of more than 20% and are active in Florida, Nevada, and Southern California. They rely heavily on pension and university endowment investments. Mr. Spitzer is said to be envisioning projects valued between $100 million and $500 million.
This is precisely the sort of thing Spitzer could never have gotten away with back when he had to pretend to care about Regular Folk, so really that whole hooker thing has turned out to be something of a boon! As he told the union officials, people have been surprisingly supportive of him when they stop him on the street. Especially Europeans! Sex is "no big deal," he says people tell him. And the Europeans probably say "ees no beeg deal" or "c'est la vie!" Or "way to fuck hookers, Mr. Governor! Now please pay me significantly less than I paid for this property I bought and flip it for a small profit!"
