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On Monday, Apple CEO Steve Jobs is expected to announce a relatively minor set of upgrades to the iPhone. Yet the world — and not just the tech world — waits with bated breath for the turtlenecked one to speak. How does Microsoft respond? With a 522-word memo from Microsoft mobile executive Andy Lees to "Our Windows Mobile Partners." Lees might have some good arguments in Microsoft's favor, but he buries them behind phrases like "It’s now my honor and privilege." Apple would just take our 100-word version, below, and turn each bullet point into a Mac vs. PC commercial.

  • This year we will sell nearly 20 million [Windows Mobile] licenses. We sold more in the previous four quarters than RIM, and growth was greater than Apple’s iPhone.
  • We give customers nearly 150 different phone choices — phones with full keyboards, touch screens, rich email, picture, music experiences, GPS, 3+ megapixel cameras, and voice activation. Features other operating systems have been slow to deliver.
  • Customers can send instant messages or update their calendars in Brazil, Belgium, India, Italy.
  • We deliver more than 40 different phones that run at 3G speeds, at prices that meet a range of customer needs.
  • Windows Mobile customers have over 18,000 applications.
  • Competitors are announcing upgrades we delivered to customers years ago.