Is Britney Spears Plotting A Comeback In The Perilous Land Of The All-You-Can-Eat $4.99 Buffet?
According to reports in everyone's favorite trusted supermarket tabloid, Britney Spears is allegedly deep in planning mode for Comeback #487. Sources tell the National Enquirer that Spears is shelling out up to $10 million on what sounds like a very tasteful, classy-by-way-of-Louisiana string of song-and-dance shows at The Palms, one of K. Fed's favorite places to sink into debt play the big baller. Where Spears is coming up with all this cash, considering most of her dough is currently going towards her father's daily rate for babysitting, is still a mystery. But based on the description of her latest plan to "jump-start her career," we're not so sure these shows will do much aside from force us to remember Britney Spears Comebacks number 1 through 486:
As their source puts it, "She wants to make a splashy comeback in Las Vegas. She wants the show to be full of high energy and flashy costume changes." And while costume changes would be refreshing after her most infamous Comeback in that bejeweled bikini, her slightly varied outfits throughout that post-rehab string of weavetastic surprise shows at small venues didn't help to disguise the fact that she'd lost her dancing prowess, nor did they help plug our ears. But we do enjoy the use of the word "flashy." A dose of flash or two could have gone a long way towards saving her gritty pole-dancing performance in the video for "Gimme More." Putting aside our lack of belief in her latest scheme, we're primarily worried about Spears spending so much time in Vegas. The last time she "appeared" at an event on the Strip, she wound up wobbly welcoming the New Year before promptly passing out. Lest we forget, this is also the city that hosted her merry garter-adorned dream wedding. What happens to Britney in Vegas rarely stays in Vegas, unfortunately.