Bagel-Snatching Craft Services Bandits Terrorize Sony Lot
We bring to you yet more news of unsavory comings and goings on the Sony lot, this time in the form of an all-employees-bulletin distributed on the company intranet, informing whoever keeps sneaking up to craft services tables to load up on illicit granola bars, purloined M&Ms, and stolen slices of soggy turkey wrap that the jig is up:
UNAUTHORIZED USE OF CATERING AND CRAFT SERVICE ON THE LOT Thursday Jul 10, 2008, SPE
Over the last couple of weeks, Studio Operations has received a number of complaints from production companies who are experiencing an increased number of unauthorized persons entering their stages and eating from their craft service areas and catering trucks.
Please note that any person entering stages or utilizing craft service and catering services on the Studio lot without prior authorization from the production company or the Studio Operations department is in violation of Studio policy. This also applies to special events, concerts or any other activity on the stages or the Studio lot.
Thank you for your cooperation.
The studio is now mulling taking the extra measure of hiring a new security staff to man each and every table, and going so far as to issue laminated credentials. Should an unauthorized snacker so much as dip a single cauliflower floret into some hummus without first showing their IDs, guards are under strict orders to tazer the offending grazer; legitimate craft services users will then be required to step gingerly over their incapacitated, convulsing bodies, and partake freely of the carb-heavy spread.
