Um, hi. I hate to start a Monday morning off this way, but journalistic integrity demands I do so. Have you ever had sex with food? No, I don't mean humping a casserole or anything (if you have done that, I'm not judging!) but rather food-play. It seems an actor likes to smear himself in edibles before he does the deed with a hooker. I... Yeah. I don't know. Here's the item: "I honestly thought I knew about most sexual fetishes. I guess I have heard of this, but never heard of anyone who actually participated. The thought that a former A list film actor and now a B- with some great name recognition would enjoy participating in food sex is kind of funny. Food sex as in covering you and your partner in various foods and then having sex. Our actor only does it in hotels and only with hookers. Maybe having all that food all over him hides his bald areas." [Crazy Days and Nights] Two more less-gross items after the jump.

  • "Our B list film actress who happens to be married to a real winner was on a recent modeling shoot. Our actress loves crack and had arranged to meet a friend of a friend while she was in this city not her own who was going to supply her with everything she needed. He did show up, and she bought enough rocks to get her through the day. Unfortunately she didn't have a crack pipe because she didn't want to carry it on the plane. Her dealer didn't have one either. To say she was upset was an understatement. She sent her dealer and her assistant out to get one. They came back a short while later with one they had got from a homeless person for $100. Our actress didn't even bother to say thanks. Just spent the next hour in kind of a haze, the photo shoot be damned." [Crazy Days and Nights]
  • "Which Brit singer is refusing to marry his long-term girlfriend because he hasn't done with playing away? He is trying to convince her it would do them both good to explore different partners." [Mirror]