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If you find yourself desperately in need of conversation topics at any point over the weekend, we'd like to suggest that you print out this handy dandy cheat sheet on a sheet of 8.5 x 11 paper, laminate it and carry it with you in your back pocket, purse or both (if that's how you roll). It will come in handy, trust us. Don't forget to use the power of hyperlinks to research your chosen conversational topics first, though. Remember, asking a question is only one part of engaging in an adult conversation!

· Hey, did you hear that New Line slashed about 90% of its work force?
· Man, what do you think about Lindsay Lohan moving in with her good "friend" Sam Ronson?
· This one's for the guys. If you were doing a full-frontal nude scene like Jason Segel in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, how would you ensure you at least had a semi-chub when the camera started rolling?
· Did Randy Jackson get a boner or did he just want a donut?
· Why does David O. Russell have to be such a dick all the time?
· Psst! Wanna hear some Sex And The City spoilers? No, we're not talking to you, Mr. Guy Pretending To Be John Corbett.
· If Ashlee Simpson's unborn baby cried in the woods, would the glossies pay to hear it?
· Do you think that guy who claimed to have brokered the sale of a Marilyn Monroe sex tape is full of shit or what? (Hint: there's only one answer to that question)
· How do the producers of CSI: [Insert Glamorous City Here] expect life to go on now that they've shitcanned Gary Dourdan?
· Robert DeNiro: comedy genius or terrible bore?
· Just how bad is Indy 4 gonna be, really?
· What would you rather do: spend 88 minutes watching 88 Minutes or listening to one of Al Pacino's boring stories?
· Oy, just what does Tom Cruise have against Posh Spice anyways?
· Um, got any goats?