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Mark Zuckerberg dodged a bullet. His mug got featured on TMZ next to a picture of his secret mistress, and luckily she happened to be his actual girlfriend. Michael Arrington kicks Valleywag out of a party, giving our party report far more attention than it probably deserved. And Robert Scoble strikes a Roman Polanski-esque pose with an underage tech-starlet in his lap. As a captain of online industry, a hack covering the beat and a publicity-hungry B-lister, all three share one thing in common — they want the good stuff that comes with being public figures (free publicity, adoring fans, access to wealth) without the bad (salacious press, limited privacy and expensive hangers-on). The world, of course, doesn't work that way. So here's eight tips from the entertainment industry that might help them navigate the nascent perils of Internet fame.

  • Fans versus friends: Be careful who you call a friend, especially in public. Because they may very well publicly deny said friendship. Awkward! Instead, say you're a fan — you show your respect without requiring their reciprocation. On the other hand, be nice to your own fans, since they're the ones who rabidly defend you in the comments and show up to your parties.
  • Pre-empt gossip: Get caught snogging someone of the wrong age, class or gender? See a flash pop as you lean into that pile of drugs for a whiff? Spin it in public yourself before the gossip hounds and rumor mill can spin it for (and against) you.
  • Think before you publish: Every appearance made and project undertaken by a star is considered from multiple career angles before it's agreed to. You might call your Twitter updates about bowel movements "radical personal transparency." Others call it "bad business decision."
  • Personal grooming: You might be able to show up on the Google campus in a t-shirt, shorts and flip-flops. That doesn't mean you should show up at the Webbys in the same outfit. If you make a pile of VC cash or flip your company, you might want to consider spending some of it at Barneys and getting a decent haircut.
  • Don't swim without a buddy: Going out on the town, or just to South by Southwest? Bring a friend who knows these rules as well or better than you do. You never know when you'll need someone to push you into a cab or knock that tell-tale, post-rehab martini out of your hand just before getting run over by on-rushing Flickr users.
  • Hire professional help: To some, this all comes quite naturally. They're called lawyers, stylists, managers, publicists, agents and the like. They make it their business to know these things, and can offer an invaluable objective perspective when your own vision is blinded by the glare of stardom. And they'll often volunteer when you're young and illiquid if they can trust you to be loyal when you cash in.
  • Don't slag your competition — much: Fame, as Emily Dickinson once wrote, is a fickle food. There's a fine line between friendly competitive posturing and creating lifelong enemies. You really don't want to piss off someone you might eventually find yourself begging, on hands and knees, to hire or acquire you.
  • Have a sense of humor, and humility: This is, by far, the most important, both for your public image and for your own self esteem. The Internet is not, in the grand scheme of things, serious business. We all get planted in the ground eventually. Have some fun and keep it all in perspective.