Except for dry cleaners, almost everyone likes the New York City cigarette ban. People smell better, smokers have an excuse to leave a bad conversation and non-smokers feel left out, as they should. But oh no: we're getting fat without our cigs! From 2002, when the law was enacted, through 2004, New Yorkers gained 10 million pounds collectively. Imagine how fat we are now! The island will surely sink if we can't smoke indoors. Manhattan will become a post-apocalyptic wasteland inhabited only by Will Smith and roving hordes of zombie fatties, unless you give us back our cigarettes. What's a little cancer compared with looking good in skinny jeans? [NY Sun]