"Wigs and Prosthetics"
Spring is here! Rebirth, regrowth, brand new things! Though, we doubled up here bit a from last week, with a few familiar commenters lurking once again on the best of the week list. Ah well. They were deserved. Perhaps they're evergreens, lasting the same all year round.
- From flossy in 'New York' Stays Classy, Always:
"This is all just a build-up to next month's raunchy celebutard orgy photospread involving Paris, Lindsay, Britney, Ashley Alexandra Dupré, and the entire cast of The Hills, all of whom will actually be Cindy Sherman in various wigs and prosthetics." (Pareene's pick) - From VirusWithShoes in NYT Brought to You by Apple:
"I don't see ads on the web normally as I use black electrical tape to block them on my computer screen. I have four pieces already cut for when I start surfing and I place them carefully while squinting or looking at the screen out of the corner of my eye to stop me making a rash purchase during the viewing process. My strips are all of equal size and I haven't bought anything off the internet for a long time, apart from 40 rolls of electrical tape, as I find I can only use my ready-cut strips so many times before they begin to lose their natural stickiness and start to fall off while I'm reading an article about rich people spending money or something like that and they land on my keyboard like dead plastic leeches and get in the way of me typing all my emails to David Cassidy. I have special red electrical tape for when there are pop-ups, but I have that on a dispenser because you can never tell what size they are, or when they are going to appear and I have to be quick on the dispenser, and both fluid and calm in my movements in case I crack another computer screen again. If I find a pop-under has arrived I use a sheet of cardboard with a picture of a lemur on it to block it when I close my browser while clicking frantically in the area I guess is the top right-hand corner. I find my prompt actions has enriched my internet experience and saved me countless of dollars in untold amounts this month alone." (Hamilton's pick) - From InOtherNews... in What I Hate About the DNC:
"'...and we're gonna mark it 'urgent'... then 'Priority Mail'... then 'Express Mail'... YEEEEEEEEEEAH!!!' - - Howard Dean" (Rebecca's pick)
- From ClockOnTheStove in Chris Crocker Got 800 Thousand Views for Blinking Twice:
"I'd rather have one person look at me with respect than have 800,000 people look at me with pity." - From BinkysDream in Breakthrough Website Gives Women Cute Guy Info:
"'To the left' in Italian is "sono arrapata", if I remember correctly."
Your Party Pick this week goes the mysterious Hamud (who are you??) who wove a lovely story in Who You Are and Why You Are So Mad:
"Rebecca, back when you and I first married — this wasn't long after I'd simultaneously divorced Barry Diller and Joni Evans — you came to me with tears in your eyes asking that we find a "small, quiet place" in Croton-on-Hudson or Sheepshead Bay. A small, quiet place where we could settle down and you could really concentrate on doing that biography of Cosima Wagner you'd always wanted to write.
At that time, you said you wanted to distance yourself from the 'glib wit of Manhattan sophisticates.' You wanted to make your own soap and wear a lot of Laura Ashley.
Whatever happened to that Rebecca? (And, no. Please don't blame Barry for coming between us. I started seeing Barry again only after you'd barricaded yourself in your cabin at Yaddo for eight months, refusing to come out even after Dave Eggers spent hours on your doorstep, trying to reason with you.)
But you changed after Yaddo. Something had hardened within you. Some sort of grim resolve had stiffened. And now Cosima and Sheepshead Bay are forgotten and you are a star on one of the internet's most glamorous webspaces, trading quips and witticisms with all and sundry.
It's a trade-off you willingly and knowingly made. The best you can do is honor it with some grace."
Happy Easter, happy non-Easter, happy SPRING!