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Is Valentine's Day simply a stinging reminder of singlehood, like a coarse-grained sea salt rubbed into your painful, wounded heart? asks Fresh Direct, the home grocery-delivery service we can't afford. Well, yes. Luckily, they have some sort of five-step program to help us out. For some reason, they involve all manner of produce, delivered right to our door. Oh, and cat litter, naturally!

We've got a few ideas on how to ease the suffering. Just check out this handy selection of our favorite items for the brokenhearted. From bitters (to match your mood) to thyme (said to heal all wounds) these items might just cushion the bumpy trip from your blind denial all the way to newfound acceptance of single life.

You can choose from one of five familiar categories: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. Choosing Anger means you should purchase the Seared Cajun Blackened Salmon (ready-to-cook), although we would have picked a steak (cooked rare, almost bloody).

Choosing Acceptance involves buying Fresh Step Scoopable Cat Litter, which clearly means you've accepted your fate, and will end up alone.