This image was lost some time after publication, but you can still view it here.

Defamer just managed to get our grubby mitts on a secret copy of a strongly-worded letter that "Actress" Kirstie Alley's legal team over at Goldman & Kagon recently sent to US Weekly. In it, the firm asks that United States Weekly sever their relationship with fashionista/comedienne Danica Lo because of an innocuous Scientology joke she made at the expense of billion-year contract escape clause benifitee Nicole Kidman. The joke in question ran in the "Fashion Police" section of the mag and referred to an outfit Kidman wore to the Australian premiere of The Golden Compass, which the tony Miss Lo described as being "specifically designed [to repel] Scientologists." Um, zing? The legal letter and offending picture follow after the jump.

Yes, by now we've all heard and seen that Kirstie Alley "would be dead" without Scientology. We're not here to cast aspersions in her general direction because, hey, whatever floats her boat is fine by us, ya know? But with billable hours being the way they are these days, we're wondering if it was a good use of her legal eagles' (apparently unlimited) time to crank out a toothless missive for what amounted to be a throwaway one-sentence joke buried on page 87 of a glossy mag. We're going with a strongly-worded yet equally toothless response of "Not so much!"

This image was lost some time after publication, but you can still view it here.
This image was lost some time after publication, but you can still view it here.