Letterman May Go Back To Work With Writers, While Returning Conan And Leno Go It Alone
It's looking like our long national nightmare of a rerun-plagued late-night network schedule is finally coming to an end, even as the WGA strike stretches on into the new year; over the weekend, the NY Times reported that David Letterman's Worldwide Pants, the independent producer of The Late Show and The Late Late Show, was trying to reach its own CBS-circumventing deal with the Guild to get back on the air with its writing staff; this morning, NBC has announced that both Conan O'Brien and Jay Leno are headed back to work on January 2nd without writers, a move that O'Brien explains was necessary to keep his bosses from pulling the trigger on the gun pointed at his staff's collective temple. Reports Variety:
"With the New Year upon us, I am left with a difficult decision," he said in a statement released by NBC Monday morning. "Either go back to work and keep my staff employed or stay dark and allow 80 people, many of whom have worked for me for fourteen years, to lose their jobs.
"If my show were entirely scripted I would have no choice," he added. "But the truth is that shows like mine are hybrids, with both written and non-written content. An unwritten version of 'Late Night,' though not desirable, is possible - and no one has to be fired."
O'Brien said that he plans to talk about the strike on his show.
"I will make clear, on the program, my support for the writers and I'll do the best version of 'Late Night' I can under the circumstances," he said. "Of course, my show will not be as good. In fact, in moments it may very well be terrible. My sincerest hope is that all of my writers are back soon, working under a contract that provides them everything they deserve."
We're sure that O'Brien's forced return to work will be an emotionally stirring affair; once he finishes apologizing to his audience for the shortfall in quality that will inevitably plague his writerless product, he'll be joined on stage by the Masturbating Bear, a member of his late night family who'll continue to be adversely affected by his joke-writing staff's absence. Nothing more than a knowing nod toward the bear's grotesquely swollen testicles, which now agonizingly strain against a once loose-fitting diaper and can't be drained by a furiously stroking ursine paw without the services of Guild members, will be necessary to communicate the suffering we'll all experience until the strike is settled.
