Bodybuilder Sues 'Conan' For Gifting Him To Clay Aiken For Christmas
Conan O'Brien's parent company NBC Universal has just been sued over a Clay Aiken gay joke. (Is specifying "gay" joke a waste of typing?) The catch: the suit hasn't been filed by Mr. Aiken. This one comes straight from bodybuilder Dennis "The Menace" James, the Idol also-ran's punchline lust-object:
According to the complaint, filed by attorney Steven Sokoloff in Los Angeles Superior Court, O'Brien "showed a Christmas Card which featured the face of 2003 American Idol runner-up, Clay Aiken, smiling on the right side of the card, and the phrase 'All I want this year is a White Christmas' on a fold out flap on the left side of the card.
O'Brien then opened the left side of the card to reveal the punch line, '...And a Black Body Builder,' above which was a photograph of Plaintiff posing at the 2004 IFBB Mr. Olympia Competition."
Mr. James is suing for, among other things, "unjust enrichment and quantum meruit," which sound like the two steps before Iran has the bomb but are actually legal terms: "Unjust enrichment" asserts that Mr. O'Brien profited, in an unjust fashion, from his Clay-Aiken-wants-to-have- gay-sex-with-black-men jibe, and "quantam meruit" is a Latin term which translates roughly to "as much money as my shady-ass shark can squeeze out of you simps." NBC will likely order writers to use only public domain images in their "Clay Aiken is a homosexual" jokes, so watch for a clip of a cardboard cutout Clay staring wide-eyed at Mount Rushmore while squealing, "Ooh, that should be big enough!"
