This image was lost some time after publication.

Remember Hakia? It's the here-today, likely-gone-tomorrow search engine which allows users to meet other users searching for the same topic. A frightening feature, to be sure. But it'd be worse if Hakia members actually had to meet each other in person. Starting with the obvious, here is a list of queries whose searchers you don't want to meet. (Or maybe you do. Pervert.)

  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Golden Nasty" because wouldn't you feel better believing you're the only one into it?
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for your name because you are so alone, so alone.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Robert Scoble" because who wants to be alone in a room with Robert Scoble?
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Julia Allison" because Jakob Lodwick is always naked and you also have to watch out for flying bile.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Jakob Lodwick" because, again, Jakob Lodwick is always naked.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "TechCrunch" because dumb can smell bad.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Valleywag" because too much of a good thing is still too much. Even if it's looks, money, power and supreme taste.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "bulldogs" because who wants to be alone with Jason Calacanis and Paul Boutin?
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "iPhone" because get there too early and BOOM! you're out $100.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Leopard" because everyone there will think they're smarter than you.
  • You do want to be in a room with other users searching for "A380 4 sale 4 cheap" because who doesn't want a ride to Necker Island?
  • You do want to be in a room with other users searching for "Adidas sandals" because pass the Viking horns.
  • You do want to be in a room with other users searching for "Facebook employees violating user privacy" because why not? Facebook employees already knew you were thinking it anyway.
  • You do not want to be in a room with other users searching for "Do Not Track List" because you'll only think the room is empty.
  • You do want to be in a room with other users searching for "Golden Nasty" because why not get out there? Shake some hands.

(Photo by Joe Shlabotnik)