Bel Air Residents Don't Want Britney Spears Trashing Up Their Fancy Neighborhood
As compellingly pointed out by Inside Edition last night, the streets of her beloved Los Angeles have become increasingly perilous for embattled, part-time mother Britney Spears, as the Starbucks runs and sushi lunches she once scheduled with the major paparazzi agencies without incident have now devolved into full-blown riots where upset citizens launch espresso-enriched Molotov cocktails at the pop star and her unwelcome shutterbug entourage.
In one of the darkest moments of a profoundly bleak few weeks, a representative of the Bel Air Neighborhood Watch shouted at Spears as she arrived for a meal, "Nobody wants you here! You're making this neighborhood unsafe!," seemingly terrified that the interloper planned to drive her Mercedes onto a nearby lawn, promptly place it up on blocks, and then set her naked children loose for an impromptu play date, destroying property values for a three-block radius. Obviously, no one had told the overprotective local that the babies are in the custody of their father, far away from their sleepy community.