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When Rosie O'Donnell joined Roseanne Barr on the stage of a New York comedy club last night, she stunned audiences when she abandoned her regular prop-comedy act involving a cardboard standee of Elisabeth Hasselbeck and a black Sharpee with which to scrawl Hitler moustaches. Instead she revealed yet more stunning insights into her abrupt departure from The View, and into her tangled, beyond icky relationship with Barbara Walters:

Rosie started off by saying, "When I was fired by Barbara Walters" - the first time she didn't stick to "The View's" spin that her departure from the show was by mutual agreement. [...]

Rosie also confided that she and the veteran newswoman were actually so close early on in her tenure as moderator that Walters recommended Rosie use Astroglide, which, she added, took her by surprise.

The minor detail that restroom-floorcrawler Walters might have at one point felt so comfortable with Rosie as to divulge her personal-dryness remedies renders their eventual estrangement all the more tragic. Hopefully the panel's current configuration will produce far less divisiveness, allowing Barbara to get close enough to Whoopi Goldberg to justify pulling her aside after a morning story meeting to volunteer some thoughts on flavored spermicidal jellies and dual-action rabbit massagers.