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As we know there's nothing quite as fascinating as discussing the internal reorganization of publicity firms, we note that Pat "The Iron Flack" Kingsley, the celebrity enforcer once so feared it was rumored that she could crush the windpipe of a too-pushy journalist from across a junket venue with a mere pinch of her fingers, is "stepping down" from the chairman and chief executive roles at PMK/HBH after three decades of leadership. But how will the legend and the troika of mouthpieces rising to fill her place in the corporate hierarchy spin the move? With a self-deprecating "I'm getting too old for this management crap" torch-passing, according to the LAT:

"Business projections and financial reports are not what I enjoy doing most," Kingsley said. "I took accounting in college and my instructor suggested that I not continue the course. We are now a conglomerate and it's daunting. I want to be involved in the creative aspects of working with clients. That is what I enjoy." [...]

"Now that there are three of us, there is three times more energy to grow the company in different areas," Halls said. "Pat Kingsley gave us a huge leg up. We are lucky we get to expand from what is already a huge business."

To reinforce how grateful her former underlings are that Kingsley surrendered her titles without trying to disembowel any of them with a letter opener, the energetic new management team presented her with a touching memento: a five-foot bronze statue of Tom Cruise standing atop Oprah Winfrey's couch that will adorn PMK/HBH's lobby, a memorial that will serve as an instant reminder to their clients about the career disaster that awaits them the moment they end their relationship with the firm.