Dress Julia Allison
Julia Allison needs your help! The newly single Star Editor-at-Large surely must need help topping last year's Halloween costume—though we're all afraid your suggestions will just be different permutations of 'a vulva.' Oh, Jules, of course they won't! America is your fan. Let's all pitch in and help Ms. Allison find the perfect Halloween costume. It's going to be hard to do better than her previous outfit (a costume made entirely out of Magnum XL condoms), but we're sure one of these choices, if executed correctly, could do the trick.
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We'll pass the winning entry along to Jules. You're free to offer your write-in suggestions in the comments, but let's not be predictable and go with some permutation of "a vulva." You people are better than that. Think out of the box.