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· Were Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead caught on tape in a "compromising, intimate position?" We'd rather not think about it.
· When Bill Murray explains drunken Swedish golf cart joyriding, he makes it seem so darn logical.
· Bionic Woman to be built better, stronger, faster by some other showrunner.
· Tobey Maguire is excited to bring Robotech, about a giant dance palace for robots, to the big screen.
· Jerry Lewis begs illiterate faggos' forgiveness.
· The LAT comes up with a great way for anorexic starlets to indulge without ingesting calories, and get caught up on current events while they're at it.
· We are seriously considering dropping everything to become Mexican drag queen wrestlers.
· Jenna Fischer switches her MySpace relationship status to single.
· WachowskiWatch: Lana still Larry.
· Chinese Theater folk comment on Whoopi's first day at The View.
· Brad Pitt is nearly hugged to death by a crazed, touchy-feely fan.
· Don't worry, Ryan. You'll be swell. You'll be great.
· Fred Thompson, star of Law & Order and many crappy movies, is running for president. Just don't expect Hollywood to care.