Things Andy Cohen Learned About Powerful, Legal Painkillers On His Summer Vacation
Andy Cohen, blogger, bon vivant, and high-ranking Bravo network pencil-pusher, is back from vacation, his batteries fully recharged after a whirlwind European adventure that saw him whisked from one glamorous society event to another, as befits a man of his stature. After yesterday's post—an Andy's-eye view of fashion designer Valentino 45th anniversary celebration in Rome—comes today's intriguingly titled meditation, "Things I Learned On My Vacation," which included this valuable life-lesson on the importance of capitalizing on lax international food and drug standards:
2. THE FUTURE LIES IN NUIT BLANCHE! Anyone who reads this blog knows that I love a French Pharmacy because of their liberal over-the-counter policies of pills laced with all sorts of American naughties. My current obsession is Nuit Blanche, a hangover pill laced with codeine and caffeine and I don't even know what else. As I can attest today, two of them in the AM do me just fine. Keep checking this space to see if I become a Nuit Blanche addict - haha! They're legal in France!
While our initial reaction was to question whether Andy should really be announcing his latest love affair with a sedative on his employer's website (he recently described Xanax as a "summertime treat...I love even more than devilled [sic] eggs,") there's no denying his exuberance over the effects of the completely legal French painkillers that he might—haha!—become addicted to. We're almost certain Cohen has the situation completely under control, however, and will only begin to worry if we see a post entitled, "THE FUTURE LIES IN 'GET HIGH OR DIE TRYING' HEROIN", consisting entirely of the letter "m" repeated for several paragraphs—presumably the spot on the keyboard where Andy's head landed after nodding off in a horse-induced stupor.