"The drunk driving arrest of Lindsay Lohan on Saturday reminds us yet again what lousy role models our culture offers its population of teenage girls. And that's just when that demographic group has proven itself more valuable than ever to the entertainment industry. Nearly every time Ms. Lohan appears on screen, it's a hit — and every time she crashes her Mercedes convertible, it's a cautionary tale of how Hollywood breeds movie stars too young, and unleashes them on the world before they're ready." Well, true enough, David! Except the part about her movies being hits. Oh, and the other part. We remember how much we loved polemicists who assumed that we were dumb and needed to be protected from "lousy role models" when we were teenagers! But it's not just Lindsay Lohan who's damaging our young persons, David claims.

No, it's also bad Broadway musicals. Legally Blonde is harming our girls by being "a half-baked Broadway show that tacks forgettable songs onto a familiar movie plot." Between that and the Gossip Girls book series turned CW fall pilot that has "inexplicably attracted buzz from all corners" (um, maybe because those books are great guilty pleasure fun?), today's teens are suffering from "a frightening scarcity of strong storytelling and rich, noble characters—never mind movie stars—to serve as positive inspirations for a generation lost in MySpace."

Of course, if David looked further than the end of his own nose for these virtues... well, then he wouldn't be him. But he might stumble across some really great and popular books and tv shows. Oh well!

Tough Times For Teenagers [NYS]