Girl reporter Jo Piazza, who earned her gossip Brownie badges as a Rush & Molloy stringer before becoming a full feature-writing girl scout, has taken up her sash and emancipated herself from the New York Daily News. She's headed for the greener pastures of New Jersey, where she'll help to launch the Bauer-owned ladygoss magazine Cocktail—no, not the eponymous magazine for men with small weiners that Balk made up—as an executive editor. Good news for Jo, but a devastating blow for newsroom gender equality: now there is almost literally no one left on the News's writing staff for Joanna Molloy to borrow a tampon from.

Earlier: We Would Totally Read 'Vadge Weekly'